The Story of my Life

After all the brouhaha, we finally came down to our wedding day.

It was tough planning the wedding side-by-side an on-going family problem. But two months before our wedding, Dad was on the way to recovery. While we were busy putting things together, he was busy getting fat…so that he'd look good at our wedding. hehehe

We checked in at Bellevue, Tagaytay Highlands, on 1 January. When we've settled down, I told Jom I'd like to have a couple of vodka shots before I sleep so I could be fully-rested. I knew the excitement would keep me up all night but if I counter it with alcohol, I'd be dreaming about Alaska for sure.

Unfortunately, despite the alcohol, I was up until 2:00 am. Then woke up at 6:00am. I only had 4 hours of sleep night before my wedding day! But what the heck, I didn't get Madge for nothing. I'm sure she'll do something about it.

Anyway, as early as 7:00am, suppliers started arriving. First, Cecilio (Couturier). Then Threelogy (Videographer), Blissful Occasion (Coordinator), Madge's Team (Make-up artist), and finally Jayjay Lucas (our Photographer).

They started doing me at 9:00am, and then pictorial here and there. In the middle of our preps, I got a call from my uncle saying that they had an accident. Thank God, no body was injured. But Krugger was crushed. I worried for a moment. But my friends told me to forget about it. Today's the day. And in my mind, I thought,"that's it. One final blow and we're on to happier days."

The moment of the walk finally came and boy, was I dead nervous! But more importantly, I was excited to finally get there, at the end of the aisle, where Jerome is waiting. This is it. The moment I've always dreamed of. The moment which I thought would never happen to me. I only have love, joy and gratitude in my heart because God made it all happen.

I cherished the moment. I told myself, I have to remember everything that happened because I will only be here once. I still have vivid images of Jerome, waiting for me at the end of the aisle, wiping his tears off his eyes; Kuya smiling at me as if to say I am so happy for you; and Dad who once told me "anak, gusto kong ihatid ka sa altar". I didn't see mom, but I know she's up there watching and smiling.

I've been with ADB for 7 years now. 2 years in another department and 5 years in the current. On my second year in my current department, I've already started applying for a promotion. At that time, I didn't know that, aside from skills, senior staff are given priority in terms of promotion – senior meaning their length of stay in the organization. The longer you are in your current position, the better are you chances to get promoted. Another plus factor is that you have to continuously apply because it gives Management the impression that you seriously want to move up. So I applied and applied, but to no avail.

When a position opened up in our department, I thought about it several times. I had to consult other people whether I should apply or not, most of them said I should go for it regardless of who the contenders were. But what really convinced me was when I consulted my former boss, who's now in Nepal, of what would be the best thing to do. Coming from her I know it would be a little biased, considering that we've had a very good working relationship while she was here, but I also know her to be fair and straight forward. And that she'd tell me, honestly, if there was anything I should improve on. Her opinion gave me so much to think about, and more importantly, she made my self-esteem move a notch higher.

Thankfully, all the preparations paid off and I got the promotion (I almost didn't apply for this promotion, would you believe?!). Finally! After more than four years of waiting, I got the promotion I wanted. The icing on the cake is, I was going to support a cool guy. Then I realized it was good that I didn't get promoted in all the positions I applied for in the past, because God has something better for me.

A couple of months after our engagement, I came face to face with one of my life's greatest challenges to date. Dad got hospitalized due to kidney failure. Both his kidneys have stopped working and the doctors recommended he undergoes dialysis 3x a week. This is one of things I feared most. That's why whenever he would get sick, I was always the first to worry, and that's why I have always been the police when it comes to his diet and medicines.

Since my mom passed away, I have always prayed for my loved ones' good health, primarily because I can't imagine losing another one of them. I am just not ready for that. Not yet.

I heard so many horror stories about dialysis. How it cripples a person's life because of the time spent in the hospital; 3x a week dialysis can also be financially exhausting for the family; and the complications resulted by the procedure is scary.

Dad knows all about these things. So when we brought him to the operating room to get his fistula installed, his lines were "Anak, I'm sorry. Ginawa ko naman lahat. Sorry Anak. Kung hindi nyo naman ako ipapa-transplant, hindi na lang ako magpapadialysis." It broke my heart seeing him hopeless and ready to give up. But I had to be strong. I have no idea where we would get the money to support his dialysis, all we had in mind was to give him immediate relief.

For 7 months, my dad was in and out of the hospital. We were exhausted, emotionally and financially. It was emotionally tormenting. And we were already contemplating on selling some properties to defray some of the medical expenses. There were days I would suddenly cry while at work whenever I'd remember his condition. There were days I was just hopeless and desperate to the point that I want to run away from everything.

In the time of my desperation, God would make miracles here and there. And it would bring my sanity back. First, our request for financial support from PCSO was granted. They gave us half of the amount we needed to kick off my dad's kidney transplant. They gave us P1,000,000. Yes, P1,000,000!!! For heaven's sake, you can't get that amount of money easily. Without the grant, we would be totally broke by now. Thank you Lord.

Next, there were friends and relatives who gave financial support to my dad. Friends from DWTL and ADB organized fundraisers for my dad, my brother's friends also pooled in some money for him. And there were some who gave money outright. All of these helped our family. One professional staff in ADB, whom I haven't met, made his wife's birthday party a fundraiser. Isn't that wonderful?

After the financial aide from PCSO, family and friends, there was the kidney donor whose kidney was a perfect match to my dad's. He is a family man in his 30s. Doctors said we were lucky to have found a healthy and perfect kidney match. Other patients spend a fortune and wait for years to find a match. But this one passed instantly. And as we speak, my dad is healthy and strong.

Finally, there's Jom. When all of these were happening, I thought about postponing the wedding until things get better but he brushed off the idea. Things were so messed up that I felt I was emotionally and psychologically unstable to get married. I was so scared this mess would knock his head off and make him run for his life. I was scared as hell. But in spite of these, he stood his ground and became my strength. I gave what I could and he filled up what I was falling short of. He showed me love in a different perspective. Cliché as it may sound, but he is indeed my sunshine after the rain. God's gift.

At the end of the day, I realized that love, indeed, can move mountains. The same way that Jerome's love moved me, or our love for our dad made us do anything and everything possible to save him... and God's amazing and enormous love for us made all of these possible. When all hope is lost, God's love remains.